last night my son came for dinner, and he asked me: what is absolute happiness?
Buddhism is about helping people to obtain absolute happiness. there are two types of happiness, though: relative happiness and absolute happiness.
relative happiness depends on external circumstances, ie you get a new car, new relationship, win the lottery, etc etc etc. however, this type of happiness doesnt last. if you crash your car, relationship turns sour, money all spent, etc. your happiness is gone.
so what is absolute happiness? at the beginning of my practice, my mentor asked me this question and i was not able to answer.
Now after ten years of buddhist practice and study, my realization about absolute happiness is:
1) when you really know and can transcend the real aspects of life, ie death, separation, financial and health problems etc. here is a story:
in the days of Shakaymuni, the founder of buddhism, 2500 years ago, a woman whose son had just died came to Shakaymuni, crying, miserable, asking Shakaymuni to bring her son back to life. Shakaymuni, being a buddha with superior wisdom, did not ask her to accept the reality, he knew that it was pointless to say it, we cannot ask a person "not" to suffer. instead he said: give me some poppy seeds and i will revive your son, but you must not buy the seeds, you have to ask people for them, people that did not have any deaths in the family.
happily the woman started knocking on doors asking for seeds. doors, after doors, she was not successful. after knocking on more than a hundred doors, seeing, with her own eyes, that every family had had their own suffering in some way, death, sickness, separation, poverty, hunger, etc, she began to realize that death is just a part of life, she had accepted it, was able to transcend the pain, became enlightened and became a follower of Shakaymuni.
2) when you have the faith that, whatever comes along, no matter how bad it is, would turn out to be a benefit.
i remember a few years ago, my daughter had had serious financial problems, so much so that my grandchildren's education was in jeopardy. how i suffered! my health suffered due to worrying. with sincere chanting, the situation turned around, and is still turning around for the better. because of that, my daughter has become a better person, wiser on budgetting, more earnest in improving herself, more active on kosen rufu. this is sure a benefit.
had i had enough faith in the gohonzon then and knew that everything would be alright in the end, i would not have suffered.
I remember one of my sgi senior member had said "I am always happy, i have enough faith in the gohonzon to know that whatever comes along would turn out to be a benefit." i will try to keep this in my heart.
3) when we have the wisdom, courage, life force and blessing to overcome our problems, become happy and help others to obtain happiness.
after i had separated with my ex boyfriend 7 years ago, i was all crying and desperate. so much so that my mentor had asked me to stop thinking about myself and help others. then i started to do kosen rufu (teaching people about chanting and buddhism) and visited people in hospitals, etc teaching them chanting. there were two incidents:
a) i visited a guy with terminal cancer. he suffered physically and spiritually. due to prior misunderstanding he broke away from his family. i encouraged him to chant and told him about buddhist philosophy. he reconciled with his family, felt very happy, the physical pain also lessened and he died in his sleep.
b) i visited the mother of a sgi member in the hospital and encouraged her to chant. one week later when i visited her again, she told me: "there was a 37 year old lady in the opposite bed suffering from terminal liver cancer, she was very painful, screaming, wanting to die but couldnt. i asked her hushand to chant for her and the same day, she passed away. her husband came to me to thank me."
at that moment, my own broken relationships (with a plural s) seemed so trivial, i was happy with myself, i was happy that i could help people. a few months later, andrew, my present husband, came along, he is loving, respectful and we got married a couple of years later.
although all of the above may seem vague and far reached, it could be obtained through sincere and continuous chanting nam myo ho renge kyo. it works with me, and i am sure that i will work with you too.
thought i'd share the above with you.
cheers
lydia
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