i was depressed

for a couple of days last week, i was depressed.  what happened was: because of my back injury last month, i decided to take things easy and not work so hard.

guess i had gone over-board, resulting in my not wanting to do anything;  even when i did my chanting, i was always thinking of 'what should i cook for dinner;".

because i did not achieve anything, i got depressed, it was so bad that for one whole day, i just sat there, not wanting to do anything, not doing anything, and not happy.

very soon i knew i could not go on like this, and started chanting vigorously to change my life state.  glad to tell u that now i am back to normal.

still a lot for me to learn: the middle way in buddhism, which i am not there yet. for me, there is either 'black' or 'white', no grey area, and is either 'do everything at once' or 'not do anything at all'.

i will chant for the wisdom to know how to organize my daily life and time better.

cheers

lydia

上週有兩天我覺得很沮喪鬱悶.。事情的經過是：因為我上個月的背傷，我決定不要這麼拼命工作。

想我不懂平衡之這，導致我不想做任何事，甚至當我唱題唸經時，我也一直想著'今晚食乜餸, 而沒有專心唸經.

因為我沒有做妥任何事，我覺得非常沮喪，整整一天，我只是坐在那裡，不想做任何事情，也沒有做任何事情，但我是那麼的不快樂。
很快我知道我不能再這樣下去，並開始努力唱題去改變我的心態。高興地告訴你們，現在我己恢復正常。

我知道我還有很多東西要學習：例如佛法所說的中間道。對我來說，要么是'黑'或'白'，沒有灰色地帶，而且是'一係就不做, 一做就拚命'。

我會努力唱題祈求有智慧知道如何更好的安排我的日常生活和時間。